Enduring

What happened here, what haunting spree
a dirge of wasted intimacy
So proud, so strong, of integrity
our Napoleon of an empty sea
This creed he held onto his core
his visage, soul, surely none could adore
Forsook, broke heart with impunity
left her, so sure, for sovereignty
That better yet alone he remain
than suffer falsehoods, tricks, and pain
Thus he stands, lord-captain supreme
of his skiff, alone on this charred sea

But what did he know, his plan so fouled
that none escape from lost love’s cloud
No matter storm or squall ‘pon him came
he always sought solace from her name
Out of remembrance, how could he know
that from a name a temple would grow
Or how that void left soften’d, scarred
grows larger still than those from it carved
Self mutilated hole of heart
to thrum her name, let dwell her art

Upon his deck now solemn stands
loving memory that yet commands
Him, in glory, lone lord of his sea
burdened by love, of his harem banshee
The woman he couldn’t love in life
as memory as loved as wife
Thus he stands, our proud Napoleon
harried and mocked by love forlorn

/Sebastian Lindberg 10/6-2022

Heartsfever

A kiss, a kiss
through silks and curtains,
sheets of sand.
Satin summers,
and best-laid plans.

A dream, a dream
a touch of vapours,
remnant trails.
Pictured in whispers,
painted with veils.

A wind, a wind
the dance of thorns,
a whirling stage.
The berserker chords,
turned upside-down rage.

A fever, a fever
the firmament of song,
the consummate pyre.
Like moths made to long,
oh, torturous fire.

A touch, a touch
a thimble of honey,
milk of the viper.
Wise man’s folly,
s’time to pay the piper.

Ruin, oh ruin
rendered with loss,
by bricks of scorn.
Memory-made schloss,
built halls forlorn.

And all for a kiss,
a kiss,
through silks and curtains,
fortress of sand.
Bygone summers,
and bastard plans.

/Sebastian Lindberg 12/8-2017

Happy for You

He greets her with love grown old.
Two hands shake in subdued cheer.
On her hand he spots a band of gold
christened by an angel’s tear.

I have seen that jewel before, says he
I have learnt to fear it
I have learnt to mock it
I have learnt to hate it

I’m happy for you
Happy for you

The burnt child shies the flame
and’ll never hold a candle again
The feral dog cannot be tamed
Not leash nor chain shall over him reign

What ifs never could compete with what came to be
Mayhap never came to possibility
What daunting cost there is to be free
to heart and soul and sanity

I have seen that jewel before, says he
I have learnt to fear it
I have learnt to mock it
I have learnt to hate it

But I’m happy for you
Happy for you

The tab gets paid, he walks away
He’s done his duty, done his part
But neither pride or strength can sway
the howling of his heart

/Sebastian Lindberg 15/3-2012

Stupidity and Pride

Once upon you must have
thought this important too
While our lives intertwined,
just breathing seemed so new
And thus when we split,
I forgot myself with you

I feel lost,
I feel lost,
I feel lost

Once we shared every word,
every sentence, every thought
Now, my attempts to make
words heard are for naught
Instead they seem to jar,
like puzzle bits from another box

But I try
and I try
and I try

When I see you I ask
how you are, and you just lie “fine”
That answer doesn’t change,
even when my voice turns to whine
Could it really be true
that this concern is only mine

Only mine,
only mine,
only mine

Do you feel the same,
confused as what to do
Or are you just tired of trying,
and want to carry on anew
How should I know,
with ’tis here wall ‘twixt me and you?

I try
and I try
and I try
I’ve knocked on this wall
’till I’m about to cry

I fear
and I fear
and I fear
That if I punch through,
there’s nobody there

Should I even try to break through?
Will you still be there if I do?
Or have you lost interest and moved on?
How should I know, with ’tis here wall ‘twixt me and you?

/Sebastian Lindberg 28/8-2016